My mum’s demanding to be paid for looking after her grandson I’m hurt’

A woman took to Mumsnet to ask users whether or not she should be paying her mum money to babysit her son but some people thought it was “odd” that she hadn’t been

A woman has hit out at her mum after she demanded to be paid for looking after her grandson.

The anonymous woman explained her situation on Mumsnet, where she said that her mum has been living with her and her husband for the last year to help out with their baby.

“She has helped us out a lot by looking after my son when both me and my husband are in a pinch,” she wrote.

“This has been great and much appreciated and at first I thought she was happy to help out because she expressed how much she wanted a grandchild before my son was born.”

Although the arrangement had been working well, the woman’s mum has now started asking for money to babysit.

“She has recently said she now wants to be paid for looking after my son and is upset that we haven’t paid her at all,” she continued.

“She did not indicate that she expected payment in the first place.”

The woman said that her mum pays no rent or money towards food and amenities, and has even gone on “a few holidays” with them as well, so she couldn’t help but be surprised when her mum brought up payment.

“If anything I’m more hurt that she feels this way, as my point of view us paying her feels like a transaction and not the fact that it’s her grandchild,” the woman continued.

“I’m more than happy to pay for expenses that she might incur for looking after my son but in our case, there isn’t any because she lives with us.

“But if she wants payment then I might as well take my son to a nursery when I’m back at work.”

The post sparked a debate among users as they argued who was in the wrong.

Many people in the comments said her mum was unreasonable to ask for money when she lives in the house rent-free, as one person said: “It seems strange that she’s asking to be paid for childcare when she’s living rent-free as a family member.

Another said: “Say yes – happy to pay you. At the same time, we set up the rental agreement for us housing you/subsidising your living expenses and then we can knock it off what you owe us…!”

But others thought it was “odd” that she hadn’t been paying her.

“You assumed she was happy to do it for free in return for room and board,” one person wrote. “Now you know this isn’t the case she will, of course, want to pay rent and you will, in turn, pay her for the childcare.”

While someone else said: “I would pay her. It is hard looking after a 9-month-old all day every day. I think it is odd that you don’t.”

But a third person said: “This type of request doesn’t come from thin air.

“She either feels like you’re using her and so has asked for payment to end the arrangement, or you or your [darling husband] may have accidentally insulted or offended her by mentioning the extras you do pay for.

“If she were truly happy with you and your family she would never have asked for money, so you do need to delve a bit deeper before having a go.”